Congrats on the weight loss!

First, if you want the surgery, I say it’s worth a try. I’ve blown over 80k on law school, so in the grand scheme of life 9K for a surgery isn’t that bad.

I’m not sure about homelessness as an option. I wouldn’t do it, but that’s your call.

I just have a word of warning.

When I started high school I was really overweight. I’d probably been made fun of just as much as you. I thought if I lost weight it’d change. I started working out and was in great shape and looked great. Unfortunately, although I wasn’t made fun of as much, it didn’t make that much difference and I still felt bad a lot.

The problem wasn’t me, but the people I was around. What finally made me feel better was finding new friends to be around who loved and accepted me no matter how I looked. That worked WAY better than changing my appearance. The positive affirmations from other people made all the difference.

I’ve gained back a lot of weight, but it doesn’t matter that much, because I know people care about me regardless. I should note that I will be trying to work out more so I am healthier, not so I am more accepted.

So, just be aware that you might still have struggles after the surgery. I think that you should put in as much effort improving your relationships as you do improving your appearance. Looking good won’t matter at all if you’re still spending too much time with shallow people. Really, why would you want to be friends with people who judge you based on your appearance?

I know you’re already a great guy, but if you have trouble making those kinds of friends, keep looking until you find them! They’re there! The philosophy I used was that until I’d tried every possible option, I had no right to complain. I tried about a zillion things, but eventually it worked!

In the mean time, make an effort to be the kind of person you’d want to be friends with. Redouble your efforts at thinking about other people’s needs, making an effort always to be there for them no matter what they’ve done for you. At the end of the day, our bodies rot in the ground. What lasts is a loving heart and a caring spirit. God doesn’t care how you looked. “Not as man sees does God see, because man sees the appearance but the LORD looks into the heart.” (1 Sam 16:7).

It’s respectable you want to look better, but with the money you’re spending on new phones, tech gadgets, going out, etc. you could save up to do this in a few years and not totally screw yourself mentally in the process.

Anyway, I’m done talking to you or reading about this homeless shit. Your priorities are so self-destructive that I can’t be a witness to it anymore. And why do you think other people should pay for your homeless stint, via free room and board, food… Why don’t you just keep your house and make the donation button about your procedure. Geez. (And the new iPhone is more important than paying your landlord? Oy.)

Bye, Nick. I’ll be nice when I see you, cause I really think you’re a nice guy… But fuckin’ A. I can’t read about how you are destroying your life because you’re lazy.